Dead! - Age of Empires 2: Joan Quixote

If there is one thing I've learned on my journey through the 'A's it's that I'm really bad at computer games. I've put in well over my 10,000 hours, I work for a computer games company and I play literally every day. Literally. Every. Day.
An hour every lunchtime, and probably two hours every evening except on rare occasions when I leave the house to play Ultimate.
This began to become apparent when I started playing with Ben and Neil online, but I always had the fact that those other players - the ones who were spanking me all over the battlefield or topping the scoreboard on my team - were obviously LOSERS WHO HAD NO LIVES, unlike me, with my twice yearly gig attendance to distract me. But this project has removed that excuse...
So with that in mind here's the tale of Joan of Arc's final days.

Amnesia - A Love Story : Also, DEATH!

DEFEAT! VICTORY!

This has by far been the most agonising experience I have ever had with a computer game. I've never had a stronger urge to not play a game in my life, yet this experiment refused to let me bow to my cowardice. So finally, after lots and lots of procrastination, I sat down last night (NIGHT!!) and decided that I wasn't leaving my chair until this sucker was done.

Age of Empires 2 - The Cowardly Joan of Arc

This is the story of Joan of Arc, the simple farm maid who became a national hero by walking very slowly and carefully across France and then hiding in a castle.

Dead! - Amnesia: The Dark Descent

There's not much I can really add to what has already been said on this blog about Amnesia, so thought it best to dive straight in. I wouldn't really describe it as a game, more an interactive experience. An interactive experience that scares the hell out of Neil.

Whilst Neil takes the slow, methodical approach to Amnesia, immersing himself in its world, I decide it best to deal with Amnesia the way I deal with most horror related things in real life. To run through it, fingers in my ears, telling myself its okay, because it's not real.

It started off well, but as you can tell from the title of this post - it didn't end that way.

Competition Victors, Collect Your Spoils!

Winners are those who do not pity the weak, and spit in the face of the feeble, and thusly, with a massive entry pool of 8 (and one of which declared they had no interest in the prize at all) the winners of the Ninth Life's first Lame Competition (tm?) are:

BANKS!

SCHWAL!

If you send your email addresses to us as quickly as you can, I'll get your codes sent over. The email link for the blog is on the top right of the page. Thanks to the other entries, especially the guy who took the risky and very literal approach, and we hope to update more in the future. Stupid work! Why do we have to have jobs?! Somebody really ought to do something about that eh!

Competition Time! Wait....that's it?! Yes!

You heard the title in your central brains correctly when you read it, it's competition time here at The Ninth Life!

Age of Empires II: William Wallace - The Pirate King of Scandinavia

Just a quick update to treat you all to the glorious Scottish accent I've had to sit through for the Age of Empires 2 tutorial.
Are Scottish people just banned from entering America? Are there no Scottish voice actors in the world?

He's right though we really need to stop that "Idwar-r-r-r-r-r-rd Longshonks" and his 'Iffictiff' tactics.

Amnesia - Now, Where Was I...?

When I left you yesterday, I had progressed down a corridor. That's it. That was my entire journey through the game and into the warm embrace of cowardice. The video took longer to upload to YouTube than it did to record. However, bolstered by familiarity, I'm back, and ready to show the forces of darkness just exactly what I'm made.... OK, so, I last slightly longer this time.

Dead! - Age of Empires III

Woenstag 13th, Maart, 1642AD
Hallo Miss Claudia, I hope you are well. I cannot contain my excitement, as today, I set sail for the New World! We are to join MrBenn and a group of settlers in the town of Van Chubbs. I left the military academy in Amsterdam and travelled to Rotterdam to board the 'Grote Maan'. Would you believe that Bartel is also on board! He hasn't changed a bit! I sure am glad to see a familiar face, for this will be a long journey. I will continue to write to you, my love. I miss you dearly.
Johan.

Amnesia & The Failed Art of Manning Up

So, here we are.

As some of you may know, I've been dreading my second game for quite some time. My first encounter with it was brief. Words were said, all of them I fully meant. However, for the purposes of this experiment I now have posterity spurring me on, so, here we go with Amnesia - Dark Descent!

Dead! - Age of Conan

Well.

Well, well, well.

Just as I'm starting to remember what I like about Conan, and thinking that it might be fun to get stuck into it again for a while, it's all over. I'm pretty embarrassed. It wasn't a boss or anything, just some guards that I stumbled across. I'm sadder than I expected to be too.

The Empire Strikes Back: Age of Empires III

Another game, another Empire. Like all great civilisations, I can learn a lot from history (i.e the mistakes I made during Age of Empires 2). I now understand the importance of 'S' in RTS and that you cannot win the game by wood count alone.

Skyfall'd - This Is The Way The World Will End

Alarm! Alarm! Alarm!

Red bulbs all around me and flashing at full pelt, there's a dead guy on the floor, and I'm trapped in here with him, in what looks like some kind of fancy hospital. Things are looking dire, and I'm not even at the 60 second mark in my Alpha Protocol caper. Will Neil escape and set the world to rights? Or is there likely someone else who could have done it better?